I don't know what it is!

But for the last 2 weeks or so I can only sleep about 2-4 hours a night! Call it anxiety , or nerves or just fear of the nightmares that haunt me every now and than.

With Jayden I was so exhausted all the time I could fall asleep and stay asleep throughout the night! But than again I don't think I had as many fears or worries with Jayden as I do with this lil one! Maybe because with "buttercup" I know the truth behind the possibilities of what could happen and may happen...... not to sound negative- just being realistic.

My prayer each night is that I go to bed pregnant and wake up that way in the morning. And I pray that Jayden watch over his baby brother or sister. And I make sure to tell both of my babies (in heaven and in my tummy) that I love them because I feel as if I didn't tell Jayden that enough!

So again, tonight I am up again for about the millionth time.
My only hope and prayer is that after my u/s on wednesday that I can get some "rest" and put my mind at ease.

Well here's to another sleepless night in Essex LOL! And some web browsing and possibly laying back down.