The Will of God!

So today was my follow up u/s.
To say the least my need for reassurance any farther seems diminishing. My will power to hold on and hope that things "may" change have taken a total detour to just wanting this "over and moving on to healing". Not feeling optimistic because after 3 u/s all revealing the same....... well chances that things are changing are slim.
Sorry if I sound like a downer.
Tomorrow I will talk to the dr about how long he is willing to let me wait for a natural miscarriage before he feels it is necessary for the medicine. I think that is the farthest I will go.... I won't opt for the d&c. I will wait it out and let God do what he needs until it's medically needed for dr's to use medicine....... if that makes sense?
So sorry to say but doesn't look like buttercup is making it...I don't want to add hope to where hope is no longer an option..... just because this has been emotional as it is for me and for DH and everyone involved. I don't think ppl can handle my moodiness and pissiness anymore than I can.
So needless to say I guess I am saying good by this journey. Maybe in fall / winter we will TTC again,... until then we will stick to the plan of getting in shape and getting health taken care of. And by God's grace we'll concieve again and have a liveborn baby to bring home!
So here's to a 2010 baby!